Thursday, January 12, 2006

Why Web 2.0 Is So Seriously Embarrassing

I'm still trying to figure out what the hell "Web 2.0" means. Of course, the first problem is that it doesn't mean anything, or worse, it means anything anyone who wants to hype themselves or their wares wants it to mean.

I guess "Web 2.0" is some catch phrase created to help not-terribly-with-it VC's and burned out dot-commers identify new business ventures that have all the appeal of loser businesses like pets.com, right? "Web 2.0: Where A Fool And His Money Are Soon Parted!" Or was that partied?

It's a sticker you can stick on the bumper of some new lame ass business that has all hype and no substance going for it. Just like the show, Pimp My Ride, you take a broken down 1995 business concept, paint it up with a few airbrushed RSS stickers, and voila, you got the hottest new hot rod in town.

My dad was an Madison Avenue Ad man. He said he wished he had a typewriter that only had 4 or 5 keys. They wouldn't have QWERTY letters on them, but instead would feature the standard ad man hype lexicon. His typewriter would have "NEW" and "IMPROVED" and "SMOOTHER" and "CREAMIER" keys. And now I can add "WEB 2.0 ENHANCED" to his imaginary typewriter. Yes, he called it what it was -- his hypewriter.

Yes, I'm beginning to worry that "WEB 2.0" is the Viagra of the current business boom. Big talk from old guys at late night business conference cocktail parties, but nothing worth bragging about in the morning.