Wednesday, September 14, 2005

The Technologies Of Seduction

Now we must add texting to Cupid's quiver, and any suitor worth their salt must acquire the proper skill and proper timing. Timing is everything. Thumbs up.

It's not enough to know how to get your lover fired up over IM these days, today's Cyrano better have a solid SMS strategy.

And two can play at this game, girls.

A mid-morning, mid-meeting, text message like "I WANNA MAKE IT HARD. I WANT IT ALL. I WANT IT NOW." can make your boyfriend sit up and take notice, between the spreadsheets.

To every thing ... turn turn turn ... there is a season, and a time under heaven and equally to every technology there is a place and perfect moment. The technologies of seduction offer a myriad of media. The modern lover must have a finesse and aptitude for choosing one medium over another -- the right one at the right time. SML MED L.A.R.G.E ----> TXT IM EMAIL

Choose wisely. Sexy email may get you canned instead of nailed -- lose your inhibitions and lose your job -- not a good idea, and text can be so much more sexy. It has the urgency of passion. And forget the vowels, WHT R U WR-ING?

Some super sexy clown boys I know can get you panting in a barrage of modern technology, leaving you in a near-climaxing daze in a blackberry bush, then throw in a "oh-so-1970's" FAXED LOVE LETTER to your place of work to push you right over the brink. Whoa, Nelly!

And then there are the ones who still know how to wield pen and ink ... don't get me started. Love letters in the sand, not silicon, an envelope with your name penned on it can trump all other modes of connectivity and simply send the old electricity pulsing through your low-tech heart with a brand new fever.