Friday, November 26, 2004 Rocks Her World

Well, I have a pretty blonde friend who signed up for and she seems to have found a really terrific man thanks to their database, or should I say, date-a-base. I'm having lunch with her tomorrow and want to hear all the dirt.

I have to tell you I know a lot of folks who have joined and have been pretty happy with the results. I think it's kinda cool. Still, I would never do it myself. I just don't have the guts. Also, I kindof run into nice guys on my own pretty much.

Reading Gladwell's book Blink has given me a new perspective too. One thing that comes out loud and clear is that when we are asked to describe what we like about a product, a service or even a person, we often don't know what the hell we're talking about. We might say we love the guy who wants to take long walks on the beach, but then fall for the guy that never wants to leave the house. Guys might say they want a ski boarding girl go-getter but fall for the girl who's winter sports expertise ends with making angels in the snow.

On the other hand, there are new fangled dating solutions that seem to work in person. Gladwell writes persuasively about "speed dating" in one chapter, and finds that this can be very effective.

Speed dating is where a roomful of men and women are paired off, each combination chatting for six minutes, checking off on a private tally sheet if they like the person or not and want to make email contact later. A bell rings when the six minutes is up and then the man moves on to the next woman.

Gladwell discusses how our unconscious can very quickly -- like in a few seconds -- determine fairly reliably if we will like someone. Our unconscious mind is so much more effective than our conscious mind when it comes to making split-second decisions.