Sunday, February 22, 2004

What Makes You Happy

I've been noticing some people are just fun to be around -- make you feel happy when you see them -- and at the other end of the spectrum, some people are really depressing to be near.

People wear their personalities like a weather report -- some are so stormy, some others so sunny, most of the rest of us somewhere in-between. I wondered what we can learn from the bright ones.

Here's something about simply APPRECIATING what you have in your life. This article reminds me how simply being in nature can help your mood. For us Bostonians stuck in the house during this cold cold winter, it's good to remember.

Here are some other parts of the piece:

Being in a beautiful place just naturally sets off my feelings of appreciation. However, it’s not always possible to be in that type of setting when you want to shift out of feeling stressed.

Fortunately, you can do an Appreciation Audit in any quiet space in which you can take three to five minutes to think about some aspect of life for which you have a deep feeling of appreciation. Many people will do this during their commute. It works wonders to intersperse some appreciation into your life three different times during the day.

The essence of the process is simply focusing your mind on something you appreciate while blocking out all other thoughts. When the negative thoughts pop up, tell you, “Not now. I’ll deal with those problems later.” And refocus your mind back onto the positive images that make you feel good.

You can choose anything to focus upon. It may be the savory sensation of a piece of chocolate melting in your mouth, or the love you have for your family. It may be the memory of being in a peaceful place that made you feel incredibly alive.

Another method for focusing on positives is to construct your own Top 3 lists. Think of whom you would want to include in your list of favorite people to be around, or your top 3 favorite pieces of music, or the 3 reasons that you love your spouse, or 3 things you dream of doing before you die.

While you are concentrating on what you appreciate, allow the calm feeling that will come over your mind to drain down into your heart. Notice how your heartbeat can slow down and develop an easy rhythm.

Some people will have difficulty doing this exercise because they have lost touch with what’s good in their lives. Because we live in a society that is fear-based, we can become accustomed to focusing on what is wrong in the world or what we fear may go wrong next.

I'm trying more and more to get those BAD WEATHER people out of my life.