Many Gifts

This morning I'm awake and need to remember that even THAT is a gift. But I'm in a skittery-scattery mood. Not good, bothered by many small worries, little things that vex me, Monday things that should have been done Thursday last.

I unroll my purple yoga mat -- I have two, a deep oceany blue, and a royal violet lavendar purple one -- and on that mat do some simple exercises, only a half hour or so of them, but once again, miraculously reset the psyche, remembering all the important things in life, leaving the non-essential behind on the floor. Rememberring my many gifts. My health. My son. My friends. My love of words. My luck. My sense of humor. My sense of fun. My strong body. Actually, I'm battling the "I feel fat" demon. My parents are both gone, but they were there today laughing at my vanity. I feel fatter than usual thanks to winter hibernation, Xmas chocolates and too much sitting around inside and I don't like it. Like a small breeze, I remember My parents' serious worries as they watched me waste away as a kid through many illnesses where I just about died. They see my healthy body of today a little differently. They'd say I was too thin anyway and I should be thankful for a strong, pretty body that keeps me safe and well through winter. Okay, okay, they're right.

One yoga pose has you sitting very still, you have legs stretched out straight. You pull one leg in, wrap your arm around it, turn looking to your right, then further right then even further right until you're about twisted pretzelish, looking behind you actually.

Behind me on my dining room table I see three large round candles flickering yellow light, next to the Christmas tree filled with tiny stars of light as well. The candles on the table stand as tall as the figures next to them, half a wine bottle in height -- roughly carved and painted wise men, angels, a chunky baby jesus. The light is so simple. Might just get one feeling hopeful, thankful, blessed.

My favorite exercise is to roll my mat back up and put it away. I was a bit cranky, a bit worried, a bit fearful when I unrolled the mat this morning, but something else is in the place of that fretfulness now. The day will be fine, if not wonderful. It's all pretty simple. Just be there and be thankful.