Perfect Holiday -- Independence Day

The cover of the The New Yorker Magazine says it all. A guy roasting hot dogs on the grill -- a blue and white spatula with star holes -- red stripes of the dogs -- all lines up into a make-shift American flag. Even better, in the front section of the magazine, The Talk of the Town, Hendrik Hertzberg,reminds us why the 4th might just be the perfect holiday -- sorry in advance to my British friends.

The Fourth of July is one of the best holidays around: fireworks that get better every year, no gift-giving hassles, not too much commercial exploitation, nice weather (usually), no religious test for participation. And, no doubt, throwing off the yoke of perfidious Albion is something to celebrate. Still, every now and then a small regret intrudes that we weren?’t able to work out a peaceful resolution of our differences with the mother country. God knows we tried (?“We have Petitioned for Redress in the most humble Terms,?” the Declaration of Independence notes sadly), but George III wouldn?’t listen to reason. A little less taxation, a little more representation, and, presto?—two hundred and twenty-seven years later, we might all be Canadians. Would that be so terrible?

Hertzberg goes on to wonder about whether we might not be better off as Canadians, writing on their recent legalization of same-sex marriages, their thumbs down on getting involved in the Iraq conflict and reminding us of their treasure trove of comedy talent (Martin Short, Dan Aykroyd, Jim Carrey, Mike Myers, Martin Short) that hails from the North.

I say YES, let's go Canadian, as long as Mike Myers is President/King of our new nation. I mean why not start with a presdent who's political platform is a fur-covered rotating round bachelor bed and slogans include "Do I Make You Randy?"