King Lear Says Welcome To Verizon

When I startup my DSL software early in the morning, which is not easy and the interface is extremely goofy, if it works, the booming voice of James Earl Jones says "WELCOME TO VERIZON" half knocking me out of my desk chair if my audio is cranked up. And I think to myself, Christ, even King Lear is a shill now, out there on the cyberstreet begging for dimes, nickels and quarters and I really start to worry about Cordelia if her dad is stuck panhandling in this way, his volcanic rage must be even worse than usual.