Saturday, February 23, 2002

Samedi Soir

Yes, mes amies, it's Saturday Night again. Sex I promised and sex I shall deliver. Tonight I quote that definitive source, Cosmopolitan Magazine, which is probably (and unfortunately) read by more 12-year olds than anyone over 18.

But get a load of this. "Why don't you keep in mind ... that on many nights underwear isn't really necessary." Well, I guess the Cosmo girls aren't hanging out in Boston tonight where we're looking forward to a fairly butt-chilling 19 degrees F or -7 degrees C. Good night for knickers.

And don't even get me started on the "Sexual Seesaw" in their Cosmo Kama Sutra section. The person most aroused by this position will be the Emergency Chiropractor called in to perform a holistic Jaws-of-Life at $285/housecall.

The webmaster gets my vote for the ultimate titillation, leaving us hanging mid-sentence with this gem, requiring a "more" link to fill in the blank, "Your partner, leaning in front of you, butts his knees against your lower back, supporting you, and leans his torso against your thighs. (You can hold his ...more

Let me guess, " ... wallet?"